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Feeling Again, Star Wars, Vader and Luke, Rated G - Fanfiction; It's like a drug-addiction [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Fanfiction; It's like a drug-addiction

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Feeling Again, Star Wars, Vader and Luke, Rated G [Jan. 14th, 2007|11:59 pm]
Fanfiction; It's like a drug-addiction


[mood |nostalgicnostalgic]

Title: Feeling Again
Author: ring34_ani
Fandom: Star Wars
Characters: Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker
Rating: Rated G
Word Count: about 910
Disclaimers: I do not own Star Wars or any of its characters.
Notes: Takes place after The Empire Strikes Back.
Summary: Vader’s thoughts as he waits for a glimpse of his son.

Feeling Again

He just wanted to look at him. To see what he really looked like. Did he look like him? He thought so but he wasn’t sure. He’d thought his eyes were light, not dark like hers had been.

He could feel the afternoon sun through the thick protective layers of clothing he wore. The sun’s warmth was different than that of his special suit. Better. He would have liked to be rid of some of the clothing, to be able to feel more, but his skin was still very sensitive to heat and cold, to any kind of abrasiveness…like sand.

He had made a lot of progress at healing the past few months. He felt stronger, calmer. He could trust his own body again. His responses were quicker now, without his armor. He felt light; his muscles moving fluidly now even with the mechanical limbs. His mind was clearer too…no longer groggy with the various medications and painkillers they’d had him taking for years. This was how it should have been from the beginning but he hadn’t been strong enough. Hadn’t believed in himself enough. Hadn’t realized that there were things to live for. Someone to live for.

It was dangerous for him to be gone for so long. The thought worried at his mind. The handful of people he had learned to trust, and who depended on him, would suffer greatly if he were caught gone from where he was suppose to be…gone from who he was suppose to be.

The galaxy was changing. He could feel the differences in the force. Feel it in his bones. And he was to be a part of it again. How strange. He had thought all that was gone, that his part was long over with, and he would simply live out the remainder of his life in the little prison he had helped create, serving a madman. All that had changed. Everything had changed…after he had met his son. He hadn’t expected it.

Oh, there had been a glimmer of something when he had learned who the rebel pilot was. He had explained it away. A vague satisfaction that he had produced a son. A son who could be used to further Palpatine’s plans. A replacement…for himself. But that wasn’t how it had been. He’d fought his son, tried threats and persuasions to turn him away from the light, bested him finally…hurt him. The thought of that now made his throat close up tight, made it hard to breathe, made his eyes burn in shame and regret. He had a lot to make up to Luke. To Luke Skywalker.

He liked the name, ran it over and over in his mind. Had she named him or had someone else? It was a miracle that someone had let Luke keep the last name. Perhaps they hadn’t realized that they shouldn’t have. He flinched as he thought about what would have happened if Luke had been found while still a young child. He would have been turned into a monster. A poster boy for the dark side. Would Vader have saved him if that had happened as he intended to save him now? He didn’t know…he hoped so.

He saw movement in the doorway he had been watching. A man stepped out, still in shadow…a young man he thought, not very tall. Was it him? On the ship coming here two days ago, he had carefully studied the fuzzy images of Luke that had been provided by his informants. His memories of Luke from Bespin were equally fuzzy in his head…his mask did not always let him see things as they really were and his senses had been dulled by the drugs that had still flowed through his body.

The man took another step, further out from under the door’s canopy. The sun gleamed on his hair, unmercifully showing every feature of his face. His eyes were light, Vader could see that even from across the street. It was him. Luke. He was talking with his human companion, his hands moving animatedly to punctuate his words.

Trying to take in every detail, Vader decided he looked like both his parents, his features a mixture of theirs and his coloring from his father. He wore some kind of a cloak over his darker clothes, the hood of it hanging down his back. Vader wondered if he had another lightsaber now, hidden at his side. The previous one had been lost on Bespin. He’d tried to find it…to be able to give it back one day when he asked for his son’s forgiveness. It had been his, Anakin’s. He’d realized it sometime during the duel but had not let himself think about it until later.

Luke nodded something at the man he had been talking to, turned and walked out into the street to join the dark skinned man who had been patiently waiting for him. As they walked, they passed closer to the doorway Vader had been leaning in. Luke turned his head, eyes briefly searching for something. They were blue. His eyes were blue. Vader smiled to himself, his ears straining to hear bits and pieces of their conversation as they walked past, to hear Luke’s voice. Luke laughed then, at something his companion said, and Vader thought every difficulty he had encountered just to be here at this time was worth it…just to hear his son’s laugh.